Loves of a Sex Geek

Sex-Positive Counselor

Posts tagged confidence

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…And it’s going to be really hard to find messages of self-love and support anywhere. Especially women’s and gay men’s culture. It’s all about how you have to look a certain way or else you’re worthless. You know when you look in the mirror and you think ‘oh, I’m so fat, I’m so old, I’m so ugly’, don’t you know, that’s not your authentic self? But that is billions upon billions of dollars of advertising, magazines, movies, billboards, all geared to make you feel shitty about yourself so that you will take your hard earned money and spend it at the mall on some turn-around creme that doesn’t turn around shit.

When you don’t have self-esteem you will hesitate before you do anything in your life. You will hesitate to go for the job you really wanna go for, you will hesitate to ask for a raise, you will hesitate to call yourself an American, you will hesitate to report a rape, you will hesitate to defend yourself when you are discriminated against because of your race, your sexuality, your size, your gender. You will hesitate to vote, you will hesitate to dream. For us to have self-esteem is truly an act of revolution and our revolution is long overdue.”

Margaret Cho (via novemberpain)

(via novemberpain-deactivated2013052)

Filed under discrimination self-esteem confidence media society

2,935 notes

genderfluidity:

spinachindeed:

boybitch:

transtheorist:

mtfbutches:

Hi, I’m Zee! Reclaimin’ facial hair for ladies of all birth assignments!
[A white trans woman with brown eyes, asymmetrical curly/wavy brown hair, and a short, scraggly brown beard. She’s wearing a purple necklace that is obscured but reads ‘gndrfckr’, and is vainly attempting to make a muscle. On the outside of her upper arm/lower shoulder, she has a tattoo of a female symbol (in solid black ink) adorned with a curly mustache and long beard (in black and grey lines & shading).]

You, and your tattoo, are utter perfection! What a bad ass :D

word.

HOLY FUCK BALLS. I love that tattoo so much.

Hurrah!

genderfluidity:

spinachindeed:

boybitch:

transtheorist:

mtfbutches:

Hi, I’m Zee! Reclaimin’ facial hair for ladies of all birth assignments!

[A white trans woman with brown eyes, asymmetrical curly/wavy brown hair, and a short, scraggly brown beard. She’s wearing a purple necklace that is obscured but reads ‘gndrfckr’, and is vainly attempting to make a muscle. On the outside of her upper arm/lower shoulder, she has a tattoo of a female symbol (in solid black ink) adorned with a curly mustache and long beard (in black and grey lines & shading).]

You, and your tattoo, are utter perfection! What a bad ass :D

word.

HOLY FUCK BALLS. I love that tattoo so much.

Hurrah!

Filed under genderfuckery genderqueer confidence gender presentation submission

0 notes

Once Lost, Now Found: Thoughts following Frolicon 2010

I found a post I started and never finished way back in April 2010. Frolicon 2010 was a very pivotal point in my life and my personal growth. It was at my first con, my first weekend of adult parties and classes, that I realized I was a faker. Here is what I wrote (unedited):

"It was brought to my attention over the course of my weekend at Frolicon and in conversations afterward that I come off as a slut - willing to have sex with most anyone, without much discernment for who or what. And that is absolutely not true. Between the panels I attended and the conversations I had with dear friends I realized quite a lot about myself - who I truly am, and how I present myself. Subconsciously I’ve been trying to push more feminine characteristics in an effort to earn attention and appreciation (again!) to the point of being uncomfortable. Also, apparently, I’ve been expressing only one side of my sexuality and hiding a much greater part. This had led to close friends perceiving me as a very different person than who I truly am."

I’m proud to say that I believe I am far more authentic in my expression and appearance, now, a year and a half later. I make much better decisions too, and I am confident in them for the right reasons. Frolicon 2011 was an even more beautiful, joyous, and nourishing experience where I celebrated my new found pride and confidence in my freedom to be me - the REAL me - the me I feel inside. In the year and a half since Frolicon 2010 my social circle and support network has grown by leaps and bounds. I don’t doubt for a second that is partly because I am embracing who I am and rejecting society’s expectations of who I should be based on my biological sex. My 29th birthday is coming up in less than a month. I’m approaching my 30s and haven’t accomplished half of what the teenage me expected of myself. On the flip side, I’ve accomplished and learned far more than the teenage me ever imagined could have been possible. 

Filed under personal thoughts growth gender acceptance confidence